http://inaqui.livejournal.com/ (![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png)
inaqui.livejournal.com) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
31_days2007-02-08 11:53 pm
inaqui.livejournal.com) wrote in 31_days2007-02-08 11:53 pm
[February 08] [Original] Fifth Column part 7
Title: Fifth Column part 7
Day/Theme: Feb 8th/Fool's Reward
Series: Original
Character/Pairing: Original
Rating: PG
Day/Theme: Feb 8th/Fool's Reward
Series: Original
Character/Pairing: Original
Rating: PG
It had been ridiculously difficult, but he’d done it. He was away from White space, leaving no trail to follow, and was finally back with his own people. Funny, how little that comforted him.
His commanders had congratulated him enthusiastically, almost incredulous at the results his mission had yielded. Complete blueprints of the Valentine and her fellow superdestroyers, chain of command among the commanders, tap-ins to top-level channels of communication, not to mention the destruction of the cutting edge Makos. He’d been promoted to Captain, and a host of other honours heaped on him for bravery and cunning, but Chaser couldn’t bring himself to care. He barely felt connected at all to his old nickname, his call-sign having consumed him somehow.
She had called him Fox. That had become his name. Maybe that was why he had become so attached to it. Chaser; Andrew Ingle; names she had never heard. James Fox was the man she had loved, the man who had nearly never realised that he loved her, too. Chaser had a wife and a baby back in Black territory. Chaser was consumed by guilt and self-hatred so intense that he was nearly mad. James Fox, however… He had a woman so strong that he was surprised he hadn’t spontaneously confess when he’d first started pursuing her. Chaser had lost a bet and destroyed at least four lives in that instant. James Fox had a mission to hide behind, or at least he had had one until the final instant before she left to go to the hangar and he’d put his gun in his mouth. A person as evil as he was should surely not be allowed to exist. But then he had remembered that he was Chaser, too, and he couldn’t pull the trigger.
He would have loved to be Fox forever. But the mission had finally ended, and James Fox disappeared forever. Andrew ‘Chaser’ Ingle returned, in a blaze of glory, while James Fox was vilified as a pernicious spy.
It was a harsh trade, and Chaser wished he’d never had to make it.
If he were Chaser, it meant he hadn’t killed her. But just as Chaser hadn’t killed Branner, Branner hadn’t loved Chaser, and that hurt nearly as much.
Maybe he was going crazy. Magnus had set him up with a shrink in a week, and maybe it wasn’t a bad idea.
Maybe if he could be both Chaser and Fox. The one who hadn’t killed her and the one she loved. If the guilt didn’t put that gun back in his mouth.
His commanders had congratulated him enthusiastically, almost incredulous at the results his mission had yielded. Complete blueprints of the Valentine and her fellow superdestroyers, chain of command among the commanders, tap-ins to top-level channels of communication, not to mention the destruction of the cutting edge Makos. He’d been promoted to Captain, and a host of other honours heaped on him for bravery and cunning, but Chaser couldn’t bring himself to care. He barely felt connected at all to his old nickname, his call-sign having consumed him somehow.
She had called him Fox. That had become his name. Maybe that was why he had become so attached to it. Chaser; Andrew Ingle; names she had never heard. James Fox was the man she had loved, the man who had nearly never realised that he loved her, too. Chaser had a wife and a baby back in Black territory. Chaser was consumed by guilt and self-hatred so intense that he was nearly mad. James Fox, however… He had a woman so strong that he was surprised he hadn’t spontaneously confess when he’d first started pursuing her. Chaser had lost a bet and destroyed at least four lives in that instant. James Fox had a mission to hide behind, or at least he had had one until the final instant before she left to go to the hangar and he’d put his gun in his mouth. A person as evil as he was should surely not be allowed to exist. But then he had remembered that he was Chaser, too, and he couldn’t pull the trigger.
He would have loved to be Fox forever. But the mission had finally ended, and James Fox disappeared forever. Andrew ‘Chaser’ Ingle returned, in a blaze of glory, while James Fox was vilified as a pernicious spy.
It was a harsh trade, and Chaser wished he’d never had to make it.
If he were Chaser, it meant he hadn’t killed her. But just as Chaser hadn’t killed Branner, Branner hadn’t loved Chaser, and that hurt nearly as much.
Maybe he was going crazy. Magnus had set him up with a shrink in a week, and maybe it wasn’t a bad idea.
Maybe if he could be both Chaser and Fox. The one who hadn’t killed her and the one she loved. If the guilt didn’t put that gun back in his mouth.