[March 29] [Naruto] Closure

[swollenfoot.livejournal.com]

Title: Closure
Day/Theme: March 29 / accept all happiness from me
Series: Naruto
Character/Pairing: Sasuke and Sakura / none; mentions of NaruHina & NejiTen
Rating: PG

It was an evening, like many evenings before it. For many a ninja, if not caught in the midst of an important mission, this time would be relished by spending it with family or friends. Goodness knows, time was a rare commodity, a commodity, in fact, that had no known price.

Haruno Sakura was doing just that. To family she had given her dues; only a few minutes earlier her infectious laughter had reduced her mother to tears, who of late had become rather easily excitable... thinned out, worn at the edges. The career she chose—a given for a village such as theirs—was never easy to take for a loved one, least of all for a civilian one. But her father was still the same: strict, proud, and rather too liberal with soy sauce.

Now, it was time for friends.

There was a certain ache, a certain longing there. It bloomed in the secret corners of her heart, dim and musty little corners of rooms that weren’t there, rooms that were filled with nothing, rooms that echo with laughter and talk and dreams that were there... almost there... but now were no more, nor ever again. To these places she wanted to draw them, those that she loved, places that were soft and safe, static and preserved, and, of course, all hers.

All hers.

Of course, that was not so, and she knew that. Her smile was gentle, vibrant even in the squid-black, diluted darkness of that summer evening. She smiled to herself, for herself, but others did see her in the semi-night. They smiled back, even the ones hidden behind the expressionless ANBU masks.

To linger with such notions and emotions would be to succumb to the melancholy that was a waiting danger to every shinobi’s lonesome heart. The calling to such a profession was a wild one, fierce, lonely, and rarely truly understood. Sakura was still learning to live with the schisms that occasionally rose between mind and heart, duty and desire, or morality and necessity—but, hey, everybody did. The point is, despite the usual crest and troughs of mood and luck inherent in human life, Haruno Sakura was happy. It was in her nature to want to share that happiness.

Uchiha Sasuke was already there in the usual place, grave and brooding in that darkened corner nearest the stage. The two bottles of sake were there, too, one clear-toned and sweet enough to suit her palate. He was alone, but that was to be expected.

“The dobe is, at the moment, indisposed,” he spoke without turning.

“Is he?” Sakura said slyly as she sat down opposite her old team mate.

“He’s not coming.”

“I didn’t think so.” She poured for herself. “As much as he loves your dear, dour company, I don’t think he’ll leave his new and lovely wife lonely and cold for your sake.”

The dark eyes rolled to her direction in a rather bored manner. “When I said, he’s not coming, I meant exactly that.”

Sakura took a few moments to register that.

Then...

“You’re nasty, Sasuke-kun,” she accused primly. “Ordinarily, I’d have a nastier joke to top that, but this is a special occasion for Naruto. I’m not joining the teasings this time.”

Sasuke smirked. “There was an altercation.”

“Altercation?” Sakura groaned. “With whom?”

“His in-laws, naturally.”

“But I thought they carted off Neji-san to an S-class mission on the other side of the planet? I heard Lee-san and Tenten-san plotting about it.”

“Apparently, the great weapon specialist was vulnerable to a certain class of weapon owned by the likes of Hyuuga Neji,” Sasuke said seriously.

“The likes? You mean the Byakugan?” Sakura frowned. “You were referring to his being Hyuuga, right?”

“His being male, actually.”

Sakura rolled her eyes. “Okay, enough green jokes,” she said impatiently. “What happened with Naruto and Neji?”

“They fought over dinner. Hinata got pissed. They’re both not sleeping in the mansion tonight.”

“Oooh... That’s awesome of her. I’m getting tired of those two acting like toddlers. Go, Hinata-chan!”

Face expressionless, Sasuke summarized his story. “Hinata was all over their asses, so when I said Naruto’s not coming tonight, I meant literally he’s not—”

“All right, don’t belabor it, Sasuke-kun!” Sakura waggled an eyebrow. “Good jokes are subtle. If you overdo it, it’s not as effective.”

The other merely snorted.

“And stop carousing with Kiba in those seedy places. You’re getting much too vulgar to handle.”

“Like you.”

“Well, excuse me!” The pink haired woman assumed a mourning affect. “What ever happened to that handsome, straight-laced boy I so adored back in the days? He would never indulge in gossip about his rival’s sex life or make up stories about sexy Hyuuga men seducing their equally sexy teammates. Whatever happened to my dreamy, one-track-minded avenger?”

“He took some laxative,” answered the Uchiha dryly.

“Grew hemorrhoids,” Sakura added, helplessly dissolving into chuckles.

“And the world lost a perfect asshole.”

She beamed at him fondly, warm with all the years of friendship. “But, kami-sama,” she declared earnestly. “I do love you even more for that!”

The dark-haired jounin visibly blanched. By principle, Uchiha Sasuke did not blanch. Slightly alarmed herself, Sakura choked back her giggles.

“Sasuke-kun,” she prompted carefully after a few moments of uncomfortable silence.

No reaction.

“Sasuke-kun, please don’t misunderstand me.”

Still nothing.

“Sasuke...”

So she punched him.

“Dammit, what the hell—!”

‘I said, don’t misunderstand me!”

Sasuke glared at her.

She glared right back. “You’re getting paranoid by this universal-seeming jump into matrimony. Geeze...”

“A woman has only a number of reproductive years,” he retorted. “You tell me that every chance you get.”

“Oh, hush,” she said distractedly. “I’m not going to marry you. You know that. But I do love you, stupid. And you love me back—don’t you deny it!”

Sasuke merely grunted.

“Right.” The Godaime’s protégé suddenly sobered up. “I have something important to tell you.”

The former missing nin trained his dark eyes on her warily.

“Last night, during the wedding reception, Hinata-chan said very moving things about her husband.” Sakura smiled. “You might have noticed. I was crying by the time she was finished.”

“Naruto...” Sasuke paused. Amazingly, he didn’t follow the name with an insult, as per his usual. “Is contagious,” he finally said.

His friend gave him an understanding look. “Yes. He’s very important to me, too. I can’t imagine how I’d be, if I had never met him. But that’s not what got me teary.

“Hinata-chan said, that she had loved Naruto for so very long. Naruto had never really noticed her back then, but she didn’t care.” Sakura grinned evilly. “Sounds familiar now?”

“Sakura...”

“Let me finish.”

Tiredly, Sasuke nodded. For a moment, he looked all the years that had piled on him since losing his family. For a moment, he looked the haunted man who had seen and caused, lived, enough terror and sorrow to fill several lifetimes.

“It was Naruto who inspired her to transcend herself, to not only be better, but to be. He was her guiding light, her endmost goal, her star...

“He was... my you.”

“Me?” Dark eyes flickered with something unreadable. Sasuke said nothing else, joined his hands below his chin, and rested his elbows on the table, in that old familiar pose.

“You remember that night, Sasuke-kun? When I tried to stop you from joining Orochimaru? That was... That was the beginning of an epiphany. When Naruto came home without you, lightning struck.”

Sakura tucked her pink hair behind an ear, as she gathered her thoughts. Her voice was slightly tremulous, but her words were true. Her eyes, emerald green under the subdued light of the bar, wouldn’t, couldn’t, lie.

“So without you, Sasuke-kun, I would have never become who I am now. Without you, I wouldn’t have studied under Tsunade-sama, never would have become a mednin—yes, every wound I’ve stanched, every life I gave back, there was a you behind it—never would have become a piece in legend.

“Sasuke-kun, I would never have become me.”

“Sakura...” Again, that tired, tired aura. Sasuke rubbed his forehead. After a long pause, he spoke quietly, “And what would you have me do now?”

“Accept my thanks?”

Sasuke permitted himself a half-smile. “I thought you’re going to volunteer to help me repopulate my clan.”

“Fat chance.” Sakura stuck her tongue out at him. “But you know, you are thirty— ”

“You’re thirty.”

“Yes, I am. And soon you’ll be thirty, too. I may not have been supportive of the avenging part, but this ambition I’m all for.”

Sasuke seemed to search for suitable answer. “I see,” was what he finally settled with.

“You see, I wish you happiness, Sasuke-kun. It’s not just learning how to crack green jokes or keeping getting-piss-drunk engagements with the boys. I mean, real happiness.” Emotion filled her throat and she swallowed to allow her vocal cords the space to actually work. The emotion in her eyes, however, she didn’t blink away. She focused it on her battered old team mate, the wiry, tragedy-sculpted man who still lived alone in a little ghost town, who still stared at shadows with chilling death in his eyes, still occasionally transported into a world that was no longer there, never would be there. “You deserve it, Sasuke-kun. And I know you want reasons, you stupid, stubborn man, but there are no qualifications to deserve happiness! Allow yourself real happiness. Please.”

“Real happiness,” the man repeated, his tone totally devoid of bitterness. He shifted in his seat and looked at her straight in the eye. “I think it would be a waste of my time, if I repeat that speech I gave you back when we were thirteen: I’m not like you.”

“And it would be a waste of mine to repeat the speech I gave you back when we were fifteen after I beat you to a bloody pulp: I don’t give a shit.”

Sasuke began to laugh. It was a dry sort of laugh, even after all these years, but it was still a laugh.

“As for the gratitude you voiced that fateful day you broke the heart of a hapless thirteen year old girl...” Sakura smiled vaguely. “You’re welcome.”

“You’re annoying, you know that?”

“I know.” Sakura’s pat on his back was indulgent. “But I like closure, Sasuke-kun.”

“You got it then.” He stood up suddenly. “I have a mission early tomorrow.”

Sakura raised an eyebrow.

“Don’t give me that,” he said irritably.

“I believe you.” She sighed, not without a tinge of melodrama.

“But I have something to give to you, before I go. As a memento of the undying appreciation I first spoke of seventeen years ago. Kakashi gave it to me.”

“Oh?”

What he handed her was a picture. It was of the old Team 7 during the reception of Uzumaki Naruto’s wedding to Hyuuga Hinata. Kakashi was beaming at one corner, his face still concealed by that damnable mask, his eyes crinkled as he squeezed the air out of the yelping groomsman. Sakura was beside them, lady-like and wise, resplendent in the teal green kimono brocaded with dainty, stylized lilies—with one naughty hand pouring sake over her irrepressible blond teammate. Uchiha Sasuke, handsome beyond words in his midnight blue formal attire, was in the middle of all this chaos.

He had the most adorable expression of confusion in his face.

Sakura then laughed. She laughed deeply and heartily, flushing with the happiness that welled unexpectedly from the depths of her being.

“Sasuke-kun!” she called out at the retreating figure of her friend. “You should keep this—”

He waved her away without turning back.

“But knowing you’d live with such an expression every day of your life and thus will forget about it... I’ll keep it for you and remind you every single day!”

“Tch. Shut the hell up.”

“Oh, you’re so very welcome.”

~2226  032906

 

One: Basically, this is a statement: I will not freak out if Kishimoto decides not to canon-ize sasusaku. This is a friendship fic, so even though everybody’s entitled to interpret a fic anyway they want it, I’d much rather readers not insinuate sasusaku-ness, even in the subtext.

.........Hell.

Who am I kidding here?

Insinuate all you want.

And two, Sasuke’s rendered a little differently here. O_o