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31_days2014-05-12 04:58 pm
bane-6.livejournal.com) wrote in 31_days2014-05-12 04:58 pm
[May 12] [Pacific Rim] Two by Two
Title: Two by Two
Day/Theme: 12. manque (having failed to become what one might have been)
Series: Pacific Rim
Character/Pairing: Hermann/Newt
Rating: language, part 12 of 31
It only took four hours for them to build a PONS device. Most of the equipment was there and all they had to do was find it in the inventory and put it together. Newt became more and more agitated as the device got closer to completion. His nose started bleeding and he went to the bathroom to take care of it. Outside Hermann's proximity, the panic started to come back.
Could Hermann really protect him from what he had done to himself? How badly would he be hurt trying? Newt couldn't risk it, couldn't drag Hermann down with him. It wasn't fair, it wasn't right, and the world was going to need him. The world needed him now and he was wasting his time trying to help Newt, stricken by his own doing and quite possibly a traitor to his whole species.
"No, I'm not," he said to his own reflection. It didn't look convinced. Wouldn't it be easier just to get it over with? His brain pulsed twice, making him wince and sending another gush of blood out of his nose. Wouldn't it be less horrible just to go with it? He could go full on mad scientist here, be on the winning side. With what he knew about Kaiju, he could make them even better. He knew what the Precursors didn't. They could send him raw materials in the forms of their own imperfect creatures and let him remake them. Let them remake the world.
He wouldn't be a rock star so much as a god.
God, it would be easy. He could walk straight back to the lab and get started. A solid swing of his own cane to the glabella, and Hermann could be safely stashed out of the way. Once Newt was on board, the kaiju would start coming to him. He would be the new Noah, two of each kind to breed and rebuild, except for him, because there would be no one for him, because even safely stashed, Hermann wouldn't be his anymore.
Holy shit. What was he thinking about? Hurting and imprisoning Hermann to play Dr. Frankenstein? How was that even allowed to cross his mind. That was blasphemy. To think that he could- Holy shit! No!
"No!" he screamed it out loud and this time, his reflection looked as furious as he felt. He was not going to lose Hermann to this. If he went rogue, it would cost him everything. He would lose Hermann and everyone Hermann had ever defended him against (he knew about that now, thanks to the Drift) would be proven right. Hermann would lose everything too. No one would ever listen to him again. He would always be wrong, even when he wasn't. He would be guilty by association. They could take his work, cut his funding, refuse to let him work on anything important again. Or worse.
Hermann was the one fighting against this. It should be Newt railing against the mind-control, throwing a middle finger salute into the abyss. Hermann was totally out-rockstarring him right now. Newt was not going to lose him. Hermann was his. Hermann meant the world. The same ferocity that had shocked him from Hermann flared to life in his veins. No. He glared at his bloodied reflection. He wanted to punch the mirror and spiderweb whatever the Kaiju saw through him to fractals. Sons of bitches. He wanted to write NO backwards with his bloody tissues so they could read it on the other side. Instead, he jabbed a finger at his reflection's eye.
"You could make monsters," he hissed at it. "Try to make your own world sometime." He wiped his face on his sleeve, smearing red to his elbow. "You can't have mine."
Day/Theme: 12. manque (having failed to become what one might have been)
Series: Pacific Rim
Character/Pairing: Hermann/Newt
Rating: language, part 12 of 31
It only took four hours for them to build a PONS device. Most of the equipment was there and all they had to do was find it in the inventory and put it together. Newt became more and more agitated as the device got closer to completion. His nose started bleeding and he went to the bathroom to take care of it. Outside Hermann's proximity, the panic started to come back.
Could Hermann really protect him from what he had done to himself? How badly would he be hurt trying? Newt couldn't risk it, couldn't drag Hermann down with him. It wasn't fair, it wasn't right, and the world was going to need him. The world needed him now and he was wasting his time trying to help Newt, stricken by his own doing and quite possibly a traitor to his whole species.
"No, I'm not," he said to his own reflection. It didn't look convinced. Wouldn't it be easier just to get it over with? His brain pulsed twice, making him wince and sending another gush of blood out of his nose. Wouldn't it be less horrible just to go with it? He could go full on mad scientist here, be on the winning side. With what he knew about Kaiju, he could make them even better. He knew what the Precursors didn't. They could send him raw materials in the forms of their own imperfect creatures and let him remake them. Let them remake the world.
He wouldn't be a rock star so much as a god.
God, it would be easy. He could walk straight back to the lab and get started. A solid swing of his own cane to the glabella, and Hermann could be safely stashed out of the way. Once Newt was on board, the kaiju would start coming to him. He would be the new Noah, two of each kind to breed and rebuild, except for him, because there would be no one for him, because even safely stashed, Hermann wouldn't be his anymore.
Holy shit. What was he thinking about? Hurting and imprisoning Hermann to play Dr. Frankenstein? How was that even allowed to cross his mind. That was blasphemy. To think that he could- Holy shit! No!
"No!" he screamed it out loud and this time, his reflection looked as furious as he felt. He was not going to lose Hermann to this. If he went rogue, it would cost him everything. He would lose Hermann and everyone Hermann had ever defended him against (he knew about that now, thanks to the Drift) would be proven right. Hermann would lose everything too. No one would ever listen to him again. He would always be wrong, even when he wasn't. He would be guilty by association. They could take his work, cut his funding, refuse to let him work on anything important again. Or worse.
Hermann was the one fighting against this. It should be Newt railing against the mind-control, throwing a middle finger salute into the abyss. Hermann was totally out-rockstarring him right now. Newt was not going to lose him. Hermann was his. Hermann meant the world. The same ferocity that had shocked him from Hermann flared to life in his veins. No. He glared at his bloodied reflection. He wanted to punch the mirror and spiderweb whatever the Kaiju saw through him to fractals. Sons of bitches. He wanted to write NO backwards with his bloody tissues so they could read it on the other side. Instead, he jabbed a finger at his reflection's eye.
"You could make monsters," he hissed at it. "Try to make your own world sometime." He wiped his face on his sleeve, smearing red to his elbow. "You can't have mine."