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31_days2010-08-04 09:29 am
in-censors.livejournal.com) wrote in 31_days2010-08-04 09:29 am
[August 4] [Super Junior] snapdragon
Title: snapdragon
Day/Theme: August 4 / one day here and the next day gone
Series: Super Junior
Character/Pairing: Sungmin/Ryeowook
Rating: T
Forgiveness had a lesser weight than this. Rather than anything else, it could probably be called avoidance. Ryeowook was a master at it, but sometimes Sungmin was better, when he chose the less confrontational route.
Sungmin cooked dinner for them, that night. Ryeowook watched him from the dining table, pretending he wasn’t looking when Sungmin approached him with a bowl in his hand and a smile fixed in place, almost as if to coax a wild animal. Resentment wasn’t a good look on Ryeowook, so he decided to pout, instead, because it seemed safer, and it disarmed Sungmin, to an extent.
Sungmin’s fingers smelled like uncooked shrimp, fresh from the freezer. "I'm not touching that," Ryeowook announced, shoving the bowl away from himself, and Sungmin laughed, obligingly picking up a piece and peeling it in a haphazard fashion.
"Hey," Sungmin said, taking the tail of the shrimp in between his thumb and his index finger, "do you want to go somewhere, just the two of us?"
"No," Ryeowook said, after a long, measured moment, and snap went the skin, digging into Sungmin's finger until it drew blood.
"Why not?" Sungmin asked, sounding wounded. He looked almost petulant as he rinsed his hand in the kitchen sink.
Why not indeed, Ryeowook wondered. There were many reasons to explore, only Ryeowook had yet to touch on them. Thinking deeply was part of the routine, now, only reality had yet to sink in. There was always room for a healthy dose of denial, but, in Ryeowook’s case, he was already past that.
First, Ryeowook had to quell the relative ease that anger had to offer him. Second, he could claim that he never believed in fulfilling bucket lists that had no point whatsoever other than to afford him some fleeting chance at material happiness. Third, he didn’t trust Sungmin enough to believe that he wouldn’t do something as outrageous as, well, proposing to commit couple’s suicide somewhere else.
“I don’t want to be a burden to you,” Ryeowook said, and it surprised him how honestly it came out, how quickly the words seemed to settle into the air and seem like a confession tinged wholly with guilt and no disinterest, no distrust to lace with the blame. If you only knew, Ryeowook considered, as Sungmin buried his head in the small space between Ryeowook’s neck and shoulder, as if to realize some of Ryeowook’s impermanence in some sensual, physical assurance, all bones, no finesse, all awkward silences, and Ryeowook realized that Sungmin’s gentleness was probably leading up to this point.
It was a chilling thought to ingest. He wouldn’t forget about it even as Sungmin tucked the snapdragon behind his ear with a tentative touch of his fingers, a light brush of his lips against Ryeowook’s skin even as Ryeowook’s leg hooked around his waist and pulled him closer into the darkness.
Did he presume too much? No, Ryeowook thought, smiling up at Sungmin without meaning it, he could never be too careful.
Day/Theme: August 4 / one day here and the next day gone
Series: Super Junior
Character/Pairing: Sungmin/Ryeowook
Rating: T
Forgiveness had a lesser weight than this. Rather than anything else, it could probably be called avoidance. Ryeowook was a master at it, but sometimes Sungmin was better, when he chose the less confrontational route.
Sungmin cooked dinner for them, that night. Ryeowook watched him from the dining table, pretending he wasn’t looking when Sungmin approached him with a bowl in his hand and a smile fixed in place, almost as if to coax a wild animal. Resentment wasn’t a good look on Ryeowook, so he decided to pout, instead, because it seemed safer, and it disarmed Sungmin, to an extent.
Sungmin’s fingers smelled like uncooked shrimp, fresh from the freezer. "I'm not touching that," Ryeowook announced, shoving the bowl away from himself, and Sungmin laughed, obligingly picking up a piece and peeling it in a haphazard fashion.
"Hey," Sungmin said, taking the tail of the shrimp in between his thumb and his index finger, "do you want to go somewhere, just the two of us?"
"No," Ryeowook said, after a long, measured moment, and snap went the skin, digging into Sungmin's finger until it drew blood.
"Why not?" Sungmin asked, sounding wounded. He looked almost petulant as he rinsed his hand in the kitchen sink.
Why not indeed, Ryeowook wondered. There were many reasons to explore, only Ryeowook had yet to touch on them. Thinking deeply was part of the routine, now, only reality had yet to sink in. There was always room for a healthy dose of denial, but, in Ryeowook’s case, he was already past that.
First, Ryeowook had to quell the relative ease that anger had to offer him. Second, he could claim that he never believed in fulfilling bucket lists that had no point whatsoever other than to afford him some fleeting chance at material happiness. Third, he didn’t trust Sungmin enough to believe that he wouldn’t do something as outrageous as, well, proposing to commit couple’s suicide somewhere else.
“I don’t want to be a burden to you,” Ryeowook said, and it surprised him how honestly it came out, how quickly the words seemed to settle into the air and seem like a confession tinged wholly with guilt and no disinterest, no distrust to lace with the blame. If you only knew, Ryeowook considered, as Sungmin buried his head in the small space between Ryeowook’s neck and shoulder, as if to realize some of Ryeowook’s impermanence in some sensual, physical assurance, all bones, no finesse, all awkward silences, and Ryeowook realized that Sungmin’s gentleness was probably leading up to this point.
It was a chilling thought to ingest. He wouldn’t forget about it even as Sungmin tucked the snapdragon behind his ear with a tentative touch of his fingers, a light brush of his lips against Ryeowook’s skin even as Ryeowook’s leg hooked around his waist and pulled him closer into the darkness.
Did he presume too much? No, Ryeowook thought, smiling up at Sungmin without meaning it, he could never be too careful.