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31_days2010-01-03 11:33 pm
smakn.livejournal.com) wrote in 31_days2010-01-03 11:33 pm
Jan 03 (D. Grayman) Hero
Title: Hero
Day/Theme: Jan 03: innocent things which they are joined with
Series: D. Gray-man
Character/Pairing: Random exorcist
Summary: You almost think that you are a hero, the good guy, the one that will always win.
...
...
...
...
Innocence.
Its name is deceiving--spinning tales of glory and victory.
Innocence. It's hard, when you use something called that, to think you are anything but the good guy. The hero. The one that everyone admires and everyone wants to be. You almost expect crowds of people cheering you one, envying you, giving you anything and everything you want.
It's hard not to get a swelled head.
Then it happens. First mission out, thinking it'll be easy, the hero always wins. You take a train, two other exorcists with you. One's reading, the other is staring out the window.
You try not to feel hurt when every attempt for a conversation falls flat.
"I don't want to talk to you," one says.
The other, "You're annoying me, newbie."
And the pain grows worse when you follow them off. They don't stop and wait, striding further and further away from you. You almost have to run to keep up and still there isn't even the slightest glance in your direction.
(I'm just new at this, they don't know how good I am yet, I have to prove myself)
Three days of searching and you almost fall into a lull. Nothing has happened, nothing will happen. It's safe. After all, there are three exorcists with innocence embedded in them, the chosen ones. Nothing bad happens to those god favours.
Except when it does.
Red. Everything turns red for a moment when a (young, oh so young, she was only three!) girl explodes, her blood splattering the walls, the ground, your shirt.
Oh, you think dumbly, that will be hard to get out.
Soon the world turns black and white, stars taking over the red sea. They multiply, faster than you can run. There are cries, there are screams, and there is the sudden silence that comes when nothing is left.
You still run. You run and cry and for a moment, you forget you have innocence.
The akuma chases you, cackling a little.
A dead end--you hit one and all that's left is to stand and stare at the jaws of death. You won't survive this.
Only then do you recall the innocence in your swords. Your breathing calms down slightly.
(I can win this, I can survive, I am chosen)
But the weapons (you realize that's what they really are: weapons, meant to slash and maim and kill) aren't enough. You aren't enough. You cut it down, time and time again, only to find you missed it.
Or it's still moving.
Or there is another lurking in the shadows.
They rescue you then, faces as cold as ice as they destroy the remainder. They move like clockwork, like robots, and you forget that they are human.
(You wonder if you will remain human.)
"...hey, newbie, looks like you survived."
You nod mutely, seeing only the grey ash and red blood and black stars that will haunt you in your dreams. When they start to pay a little more attention to you, you realize what they knew all along.
There are no heroes in this fight, only those who live and those who don't.
...
...
...
...
...
...
Day/Theme: Jan 03: innocent things which they are joined with
Series: D. Gray-man
Character/Pairing: Random exorcist
Summary: You almost think that you are a hero, the good guy, the one that will always win.
...
...
...
...
Innocence.
Its name is deceiving--spinning tales of glory and victory.
Innocence. It's hard, when you use something called that, to think you are anything but the good guy. The hero. The one that everyone admires and everyone wants to be. You almost expect crowds of people cheering you one, envying you, giving you anything and everything you want.
It's hard not to get a swelled head.
Then it happens. First mission out, thinking it'll be easy, the hero always wins. You take a train, two other exorcists with you. One's reading, the other is staring out the window.
You try not to feel hurt when every attempt for a conversation falls flat.
"I don't want to talk to you," one says.
The other, "You're annoying me, newbie."
And the pain grows worse when you follow them off. They don't stop and wait, striding further and further away from you. You almost have to run to keep up and still there isn't even the slightest glance in your direction.
(I'm just new at this, they don't know how good I am yet, I have to prove myself)
Three days of searching and you almost fall into a lull. Nothing has happened, nothing will happen. It's safe. After all, there are three exorcists with innocence embedded in them, the chosen ones. Nothing bad happens to those god favours.
Except when it does.
Red. Everything turns red for a moment when a (young, oh so young, she was only three!) girl explodes, her blood splattering the walls, the ground, your shirt.
Oh, you think dumbly, that will be hard to get out.
Soon the world turns black and white, stars taking over the red sea. They multiply, faster than you can run. There are cries, there are screams, and there is the sudden silence that comes when nothing is left.
You still run. You run and cry and for a moment, you forget you have innocence.
The akuma chases you, cackling a little.
A dead end--you hit one and all that's left is to stand and stare at the jaws of death. You won't survive this.
Only then do you recall the innocence in your swords. Your breathing calms down slightly.
(I can win this, I can survive, I am chosen)
But the weapons (you realize that's what they really are: weapons, meant to slash and maim and kill) aren't enough. You aren't enough. You cut it down, time and time again, only to find you missed it.
Or it's still moving.
Or there is another lurking in the shadows.
They rescue you then, faces as cold as ice as they destroy the remainder. They move like clockwork, like robots, and you forget that they are human.
(You wonder if you will remain human.)
"...hey, newbie, looks like you survived."
You nod mutely, seeing only the grey ash and red blood and black stars that will haunt you in your dreams. When they start to pay a little more attention to you, you realize what they knew all along.
There are no heroes in this fight, only those who live and those who don't.
...
...
...
...
...
...