Janurary 9 (xxxHolic) Longing

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Title: Longing
Day/Theme: Jan 9/Your hand in mine
Fandom: xxxHolic
Characters/Pairing: Himawari, mentions of slight Himawari/Watanuki/Domeki
Rating: G
A/N: l feel like I'm going into someone else's territory here, but this prompt screamed Himawari to me.
Summary: She just wants a hand to hold, the locking of fingers, electricity with a pulse of it's  own.
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It is something simple that she wants. Simple but selfish. 

Himawari wants a hand to hold. Nothing more, just a hand. Slim fingers that lock with her own, a cool palm and sweaty fingers that squeeze tightly (friendship, fear, love, jealousy, it doesn't matter). There will be heat, electricity that jumps from one to another, energy transmitted with care or worry. A pulse that dances to the beat of her own, not stopping, not dying, but staying the same and beating stronger because of that.

Her parents try to give her that but sometimes she can feel the fear in their eyes, see the shiver that runs down their spine. Besides, there is a difference between parents and friends and it is one that she can't understand herself. Especially with her lack of experience. 

Still, she wants a warm hand in her own, leading the way to places unknown. She doesn't need anything bigger, like a butterfly kiss or the promise that it will stay. A brief moment, one that will last forever in her mind, is all that she asks for.

"Himawari-chan, I made you chocolates." A bag is thrust into her face, pink hearts clouding her vision, and she gingerly takes the bag, trying her best to not touch him without being noticable. "What do you think of them?"

"You should have added some nutty chocolates," Domeki says, chewing a piece thoughtfully.

"Hey! You're not supposed to be eating them! I didn't make you any!" Watanuki snarls.

Himawari watches them fight, watches them smile, watches them wait for her to eat, and thinks that this might be better than any hand.