ext_158887 (![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png)
seta-suzume.livejournal.com) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
31_days2008-08-16 10:22 am
seta-suzume.livejournal.com) wrote in 31_days2008-08-16 10:22 am
[August 16, 2008][Original] Think What You Want
Title: Think What You Want
Day/Theme: Aug. 16, 2008 "Evil is a good condition"
Series: Original
Character/Pairing: Jin Rembrandt
Rating: PG
Evil is in the eye of the beholder. There are certain things that would be considered evil by the majority of people, others that would only be recognized as evil in a particular place and context, and some that might be seen as evil by a specific few while others questioned their judgment on the matter.
I never viewed myself as evil, but of course it would be foolish to think that many ever did. To see myself as evil would've brought an end to my mucking about in the affairs of queens and generals. I would've been disgusted at what I had become. But in my own mind I was never evil, no matter what others said of me. I was pragmatic, sly, intelligent, and always looking out for myself.
The thing about being in the position where other people are calling you evil is that people who haven't even met you have certain expectations for you. When you show up at a war-meeting and everyone there is muttering, "Oh, that Jin Rembrandt is a fiend. Did you hear what he did to that poor queen?"
"That's nothing," another commander responds, "Think about the way he left his benefactor the general in a flash once the queen showed any interest in him. And what he did to the Ghirans!"
Well, when you arrive at that meeting, without your followers at your side, plain-faced, average height, dull clothes...Everyone is a bit taken aback. "That's what evil looks like?" they must be thinking, scanning you over for signs of hidden weapons, hideous scars or deformities, maybe a little demon sitting on your shoulder.
It's interesting how people begin to drop their guard so fast. How often has judging by looks first and deeds after served a person well? Never, I hope. It certainly hasn't been the right thing to do for anyone involved with me.
...Of course, I hate to talk like this. I don't want to further the impression that I'm an evil man because, really, when it all comes down to it, I'm not evil. No one is really evil. Everyone's just some torrid mix of the good and the bad and everything in between. It's the moment, the words, the decision, that makes a man good or evil. But that doesn't decide his nature permanently. It only decides for that one moment.
But, in the end, well, I can't make up your mind for you. Think of me what you want. It doesn't matter. ...There is only one person I couldn't bear thinking I was evil...
Day/Theme: Aug. 16, 2008 "Evil is a good condition"
Series: Original
Character/Pairing: Jin Rembrandt
Rating: PG
Evil is in the eye of the beholder. There are certain things that would be considered evil by the majority of people, others that would only be recognized as evil in a particular place and context, and some that might be seen as evil by a specific few while others questioned their judgment on the matter.
I never viewed myself as evil, but of course it would be foolish to think that many ever did. To see myself as evil would've brought an end to my mucking about in the affairs of queens and generals. I would've been disgusted at what I had become. But in my own mind I was never evil, no matter what others said of me. I was pragmatic, sly, intelligent, and always looking out for myself.
The thing about being in the position where other people are calling you evil is that people who haven't even met you have certain expectations for you. When you show up at a war-meeting and everyone there is muttering, "Oh, that Jin Rembrandt is a fiend. Did you hear what he did to that poor queen?"
"That's nothing," another commander responds, "Think about the way he left his benefactor the general in a flash once the queen showed any interest in him. And what he did to the Ghirans!"
Well, when you arrive at that meeting, without your followers at your side, plain-faced, average height, dull clothes...Everyone is a bit taken aback. "That's what evil looks like?" they must be thinking, scanning you over for signs of hidden weapons, hideous scars or deformities, maybe a little demon sitting on your shoulder.
It's interesting how people begin to drop their guard so fast. How often has judging by looks first and deeds after served a person well? Never, I hope. It certainly hasn't been the right thing to do for anyone involved with me.
...Of course, I hate to talk like this. I don't want to further the impression that I'm an evil man because, really, when it all comes down to it, I'm not evil. No one is really evil. Everyone's just some torrid mix of the good and the bad and everything in between. It's the moment, the words, the decision, that makes a man good or evil. But that doesn't decide his nature permanently. It only decides for that one moment.
But, in the end, well, I can't make up your mind for you. Think of me what you want. It doesn't matter. ...There is only one person I couldn't bear thinking I was evil...