[May 6] [Supernatural] Thoughts in a whiskey glass

[ebonypsyche.livejournal.com]

Title:  Thoughts in a whiskey glass
Day/Theme: May 6 - They only let him go so wrong out of kindness, I suppose
Series: Supernatural
Character/Pairing: John Winchester, mention of Sam and Dean Winchester
Rating: PG

 

 

John sometimes wonders if he made the right choice on November 2,1982. Nights when Whiskey has more sense than anything going on inside his head; he thinks about what could’ve happened if he had take the road most traveled and mourned his wife instead of taken revenge.

 

He thinks of Sam getting what he wants most in life- stability. He knows that Sam needs that (and if he didn’t then his youngest would be more than happy to scream it at him), but at least John can sometimes fool himself into thinking that Sam has more than what normal children would have because of Dean.

 

John’s fingers tighten around the glass when he thinks about his eldest. Everything, every mission, every early morning training session, Dean took in stride. Always. John can’t think of what it took from him, what this life has done to him. He’s man enough to admit that he doesn’t want to.

 

It’s why, when Dean comes in smelling of liquor and women that he’s not old enough for, John doesn’t comment on it. He just throws his son a duffel bag and tells him that they’re leaving.

 

He figures he can at least let Dean have this.