31_days | One Conversation [Naruto]

Title: One Conversation
Series: Naruto
Character: Uzumaki Naruto
Theme: September 14: me, myself, I, and the space I left for you
Disclaimer: I no own you no sue.
Rating: K

There are some days Naruto looks outside his office in the Hokage tower and lets himself think of all the what-ifs, ands, the things he could have done, did, and can still do. Yes, sometimes his memories make him bitter, even sad, but the one thing he never does is let it show.

Sasuke, you’re not the only one whose an expert at masks.

Once upon a time, he would have given tooth, nail and whatever else he owned on his person, part of him or not, to have his "brother" home again. Now… now…

Now all Naruto wants is just to see him again, if one more time. He just wants to talk to him. He wants to know how he’s doing, what he’s been up to, what he thinks about anything at all. Maybe have a spar. If he can’t stay in Konoha, that’s fine, it doesn’t have to be in Konoha, they can be anywhere Sasuke wants to be. He just wants to see him.

He never knew wanting one simple little thing like a conversation with someone was so hard to let go of wanting. He never knew that just not knowing the fate of someone you cared about could leave a part of yourself in the past, unable to move on.

It’s not that Naruto hasn’t tried. He has. He’s sent his best shinobi out into the world with one mission: find out where Sasuke is and if he’s alive. If there’s nothing else to tell, he assures them, it’s okay. I just need to know for my own sake if for no one else’s. He can’t move on - he knows this - that it’s pathetic to keep sending out these errand boys for something he hasn’t been able to let go.

They don’t find him. They never do.

Yes, he’s still playing the fool. But it’s still like he told his beloved late sensei when he was a tousled haired, ruddy-faced child on the brink of adolescence: he’d rather be a fool for the rest of his life than give up on his friend.

The only person when she catches him in those moments of reminiscence who doesn’t chide him for his silent stubborn refusal to let go is Sakura. Perhaps it’s because she too never let go of Sasuke either. In this Naruto finds some solace. Misery loves company after all.

He doesn’t ask her what she does about it, though. There are many things Naruto shares with his female teammate, but what she does about her bond with Sasuke is something he will never ask about. He knows all he needs to know about it… it is not his business until she decides to make it so. If she does, he will know.

Ten years have passed now. Three since he became Hokage of Konoha

Today Naruto has taken some time for himself, as he often likes to do, dismissing his guards for the day, since he is going some place that is hardly a risk for a young man who is more than powerful enough to take on an army. He sometimes chuckles when he hears all the villagers talk about him… you’d have thought they were talking about a god from the way they describe him. He knows the praise is hard won from the hate he used to get from them when he was a child… this is why he is hard-pressed to correct those impressions.

I worked hard to earn it, I might as well enjoy it, is how he justifies it to himself.

Naruto reaches his destination, a small outcropping overlooking the village, and just stands there, hands in his pockets. He has left his Hokage mantel at home, opting for a long, loose black coat and civilian clothes: orange pants and a white shirt. The crystal Tsunade gave him long ago catches the light of the sun. His hair is a little wilder, and longer, than it used to be but he decides nothing about himself has changed much. It’s the one constant he keeps while everything changes around him.

"Naruto."

"Hmm, what?" he turns and sees someone standing at the bottom of the outcropping, looking up at him. He frowns when he realizes he doesn’t recognize the hooded man. He narrows his cobalt blue eyes warily. "Is there something I can help you with?" he asks casually.

"I’m… looking for Uzumaki Naruto. Is he still in this village?"

"It depends on whose looking for him."

The man seems to hesitate before approaching. He halts when he sees Naruto’s feet slide apart in a hint of a fighting stance. "I’m not your enemy," he speaks softly.

"Huh." Naruto tilts his head to the side. "Prove it."

The man comes closer until they’re only a few feet apart. As he approaches, he pulls down his hood, revealing his face. He has a somewhat unkempt mane of short black-blue spikes and black eyes. Time on the road has made what were probably once very aristocratic features a bit harder but it doesn’t detract from the fact it’s still a very handsome face. He is the same age as Naruto but his eyes are those of someone who has seen much more than their fair share of grief.

Naruto frowns. He’s not sure of what he’s looking at. He knows this face, it screams familiarity at him, but so many things have changed about the man in front of him, he's doubtful. He’s afraid of making a mistake. I’m sure, I’m so sure, his heart screams, but I’m afraid to ask.

The man gives a slight, uncertain smile, as if smiling is not something he’s used to doing. "I’ve heard you’ve been still trying to find me. I figured I’d save you the trouble this time… dobe."

Naruto’s eyes open up wide. For some weird reason he feels sick and scared at the same time. "Sasuke…?"

The man looks away for a moment, kind of shrugging with one shoulder. "I… was passing through, I saw you so… I’m here." He seems terribly embarrassed, still unable to look Naruto in the eye. When the blond man does not reply after a long bout of silence, he exhales slowly, nodding. He moves to go.

"Wait."

Naruto jogs down to where he’s standing. His eyes are still wide and he wants to say more but he can’t, he can only stare at the other man. He can’t believe what’s happening, where he is, who’s in front of him. Even with all that, though, it doesn’t prevent him from grabbing and hugging Sasuke in a bear hug. Too many years have robbed him of his defenses and his pride, so when Naruto steps back, he’s palming the corner of one eye.

Sasuke says nothing, does nothing. He gets the sense the Uchiha doesn’t know what to do. But he does. He motions they sit together on the outcropping, which after another hesitation, Sasuke does.

For a long time neither of them speaks. Eventually Naruto begins to talk. From the relevant to the inane, he talks about everything, anything. Eventually Sasuke begins to respond, answering first with short one word answers, before he starts to relax enough to speak more. Most of the afternoon passes by lazily, and for several uninterrupted hours, they do nothing but talk.

Not once does Naruto ask why Sasuke is there. He’s afraid to break the spell. He’s afraid that he has gotten what he has wanted and will soon being losing it again.

When Sasuke finally stands up, Naruto is seized with an inner terror he has not felt since he chased after Sasuke that first time so long ago. Is he going? Is this over?

Sasuke begins to walk down the outcropping, hands in his own pockets, not seeming to be in any kind of hurry. "Where are you going?" Naruto hears himself ask.

"To see Sakura." Sasuke suddenly looks back up at him face impassive yet tinged with that same uncertainty he’s had since he appeared. "Unless you think…" he trails off, waiting for Naruto to give something he never thought Uchiha Sasuke would ever ask for: permission.

Naruto grins and it’s the first genuine smile he’s been able to crack for a long time. "The hell, of course you can go see her. She’ll probably faint, otherwise, I ought to warn you, she’s got a mean right upper hook."

Sasuke tries one of his small smiles again and almost makes it this time. He starts forward again, pauses, and then looks at Naruto over his shoulder.

Naruto catches up with him, and side by side, the men head back down into the village together.